If you go to Melb Uni and you haven't received this by now, I pity you. But just in case you haven't here it is up for everyone to read on my blog too.
Background: Some finance student emailed the lecturer requesting the date of the exam be changed from the 14th of Feb (to some other day) so that they wouldn't get into trouble with their other half on Valentine's Day. This is what the lecturer said:
This is such an important question that I felt that it would be important to answer to all students who may be affected by the very serious predicament of an exam being held on the morning of Valentines Day.
Hence: Dear all students (and especially those who may be romantically involved with another),
In setting the exam date for corporate finance I thought long and hard about the impact of it coinciding with Valentines Day. Would exam preparation be affected by shopping for perfume, flowers or the latest Anthony Callea cd? What about young lovers who planned on meeting for an early morning latte, a sugar-coated biscotti and a sharing of the Age's Epicure section at Brunetti's? Isn't life hard enough without having all the joy of the international day of lovers taken away by some cold-hearted academic eager to finish the exam period off and get to his summer chalet in Dromana? For who was I to stand in the way of young love, for wasn't I also young once?
With grim resolve, steely determination, a stiff upper lip, a hand of fate, a nose for trouble, a tennis elbow and an eye for detail I put forward my claim on behalf of the lovestruck to the Grand Poobah of exam timetabling: "He who must not be named but who enjoys setting exams for large classes late in the exam period so as to frustrate lecturers incharge". In his infinite wisdom he replied:
"But Sean, what of our students of Italian, Chinese or Brazilian origin? For surely you know that in ancient Rome it was the festival of Lupercus, the god of fertility that was celebrated by young lovers on the 15th (not the 14th) of February. In China, Valentines day is superceded by "The Night of Sevens" (being the 7th day of the 7th month of the lunar calender) and in Brazil, June 12th marks the date of celebrating "Dia dos Namorados" (lit. "Day of the enamored", or "Boyfriend's/Girlfriend's Day"). Surely my friend, you are not suggesting that we alienate young lovers from each of these other important members of the university community?" http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Valentine's_Day
So, with head bowed and with great contrition I apologised to "He-who-must-not etc" for interrupting his musings on whether to set the next lot of the exams under the clocks at Flinders Street Station, in the Great Southern Stand at the MCG or in the roundabout on the corner of Elizabeth street and Royal Parade and returned to my office. Students, and (specifically Li) know this: I fought law and the law won, you have to know when to hold and know when to fold them, love is a battlefield. Now it is up to you to put it behind you, to show that true love can't be beaten by a three hour exam, even with an additional 15 minutes reading time.
Study hard friends.
Dr Sean "No-problem-too-small-(apparently)" Pinder